Her Words; Her Story

Last November, I found myself gazing on the frozen ground and wanting to find a way to freeze that time with my sister. In communicating these thoughts with Tim, I shared how I desired something I could always have for the kids to see.
Selfishly, I wanted to be able to preserve Traci's voice, her smile, her laughter. 
I knew I needed to ask Traci if this was something she'd be willing to do and without hesitating, Traci was all over the idea of videoing her testimony. She had talked about wanting to do something like this by writing letters, but wasn't sure where to start. It didn't become something grim in creating a film for after she left us. It became a tool in helping us prepare her for this final step in her journey.
The secret of planning this film was so much fun to share together. 
We flew Evan and another cameraman out in February after Traci had learned the cancer had spread once again. Before she was going to loose her hair, we wanted to film her story when she looked relatively healthy. 

The Last Time I Held Her Hand

The last time I held my sisters hand was the first time she stood before her God and Maker. 
Cancer-free.
Complete.
Without pain or scars of her almost ten year journey with breast cancer. 
Surrounded by her family, she peacefully marched her way into glory. 
I say march because that's exactly what Traci did in those last hours here on earth. 

I was originally going to fly down to Portland Thursday morning, but my flight was cancelled the night before leaving me to drive the next morning. I got to Traci's apartment around 10:30am. Mom had told me about the confirmed liver failure a few days before and the turn of yellow in her skin, but seeing in person was much more prominent then I expected. 
Traci and I joked about how yellow was never her color. She said with her cute smirk, "Yeah, it's not my favorite either. It's not that bad though." She was always reassuring me she was okay. 

{ I'm not sure who looks more tired. Taken minutes after arriving to Portland. }

Sweet Hour of Prayer

Sweet sister. You have no idea the hole you left here on earth. I just have no words right now. 
I miss you immensely and it's only been a day. God, this hurts. 


Sweet hour of prayer! Sweet hour of prayer!
That calls me from a world of care,
And bids me at my Father's throne
Make all my wants and wishes known.
In seasons of distress and grief,
My soul has often found relief,
And oft escaped the temper's snare,
By thy return, sweet hour of prayer!

150 Times of Intentional Asking


Charlie and his Auntie Traci have a special relationship. One that connects them in a sixth sense. 
When one is having a bad day; so is the other. 
When one is struggling emotionally; so does the other.
There is such love, pride and joy in this relationship shared between these two. 
When Charlie started this school year he was proud to raise his hand on the first day of school asking for his classmates to pray for Auntie Traci. He was bold in his asking and it hasn't stopped. 
Multiple times a day, this third grade class prays for Auntie Traci. 
And how do we know it's been 150 times this nephew has asked for prayer? 
Well, he's kept a running tally at his desk. 

Snowmageddon Lost the Scooper

The first snow fell and Charlie was out with the attempts of building an igloo right away. What he forget to do was bring the snow shovel back to the carport before the skies opened up and dumped a foot of snow covering the ground. Needless to say...we lost the shovel and my hopes of finding it by scooting my feet around the so thought area it was last seen in came up empty. It wasn't until Neighbor Rich came and plowed our driveway once the thaw out started that he scooped it up and found it. 

{ Shovel in a snow storm...where are you? }

Happy Birthday Super Papa


With a double excuse to celebrate, we took to the roads and tackled the ride to 
Papa and Nana's for our Birthday Super Bowl Party. 
With all things coconut and carrot cake themed along with wings and bean dip, we had plenty to munch on while Lady Gaga flew through the air and the game got underway. Thinking the game was a given win, we headed home after half-time making it home before trees fell across the Hannegan due to the ice storm and wind. Papa was thrilled to have the hours spent in the afternoon with the kids and the adults were happy to get out of the house...even though we'd be stuck inside for the next week due to the snow storm of 2017. 
Papa, we wish you the happiest of birthday's and we thank Jesus for the most 
awesome Papa a kid could have. 

A Day of Play

A year ago Addison began her journey with orthodontics. 
She started with top braces and the Herbst Appliance which Daddy felt terribly guilty for her having to endure. Addi quickly became squeaky every time she opened her mouth and found many foods unable to eat because of the new jewelry. Somewhere in this process, Tim made a deal that in a year when it is removed, the two of them would take a day trip to Disneyland. No where in the paperwork did I sign up for that agreement, but with these two big kids, it was going to be impossible to stop them. 
Last week the day came when the Herbst came out and bottom braces were glued on. 
Done. Flights booked and bags packed.
Off they went for a day of Daddy-Daughter play. What Tim didn't think about was this was the first of four kids that will most likely all need the same orthodontic process...hmmm...do for one; do for all.
Have fun kids...