A Misdirected Moment of Pause

A new year. 
A new start. 
A new beginning. 
Sometimes that’s all one needs to turn the page to make the next step into something great. 

As a stay-at-home mama to three kiddos, having time to stop, take a deep breath and pause before taking the next step forward is hard to find. This past weekend, My Love gave me just that; a time to stop, pause, reflect and to have fun. I left home with my suitcase packed full of snow pants, snow boots, stocking hats and warm gloves with the expectation of a romantic get-away to Steamboat, CO. I had myself dressed in layers with childcare pre-arranged as Tim had organized the surprise of all surprises. Little did I know that I would be landing hours later, cozy wool socks on, in Kona, Hawaii!

{ Prepared for a snow storm. }

Sure enough, Tim pulled a good one on me (oh, yeah, our oldest was in on the surprise trip too!) as a month of secrets led to the weekend of rest with my dear, sweet friend Catherine, who had moved to Kona six months earlier. The shock was very much present even after five hours of processing over the ocean. The weekend began immediately as we stayed up until one in the morning catching up and chatting. That then led to a days worth of exploring, swimming and enjoying the presence of each other. The pause in life continued the next day as we parasailed 1200 feet up in the sky, paddle boarded over the turquoise seas, snorkeled with schools of colorful fish and hiked drop-off cliffs through the jungle. 

{ No boots required. }

{ I could only focus on one thing; turning & waving about 
made me dive into the deep blue. }

{ Living on the edge...technically climbing it. }

Life is demanding. Life refuses to stop; it can’t be put into slow motion through selected situations. We are given a choice to move forward or to rapidly make a U-turn unwilling to face what the road ahead looks like. Recently, I have felt overwhelmed with potentially new seasons and being able to clearly hear God’s voice as I want to obediently execute my purpose for His plan in my life. 

The push and pull of life has never felt so heavy than what it has been over the past few months. My husband saw this wearing on me and knew that no other Christmas gift would amount to what this weekend would bless me with, as for a brief moment, the strain from the push and pull paused; it fell silent. I’m leaving with clear direction, understanding and insight for the new year. I’m leaving with new experiences shared and tummies full from delicious meals and couch time snacks.

The challenge will come when I wake up back home and find the demands of life meeting me first thing in the morning. The decision to embrace the pause will come when the first panicked wife calls as she is faced with betrayal; when my sister’s doctor appointments fall short and report unwelcome news. The challenge to seek peace when the kids choose to button push and responsibilities of home schooling become present.

I feel more prepared for the road I’m on as 2016 is here and moving. My prayer is the push and pull of responsibilities and desire to fulfill my purpose in life doesn’t cloud the drive to His destination; the journey God has me on. I pray that I can pause a few more times to take in the sights, have some fun and let go of the burden not mine to carry.
And hey, if it takes another surprise trip to Kona in wool socks to dump some burdens, then let it be that Tim seeks a female to pack my suitcase next time rather than the awesome attempt he made. 

{ Layover in Portland made for a sweet sister visit & the 
random passing by of my MIL. }

Our Twenty Fifteen Recap

What was the best part of this past year?
Charlie - Family (being Auntie's cheerleader)
Addison - This Christmas. (no reason; just loves this time of year)
Myriam - Playing with toys (Pet Shops, Olaf)
Tim - Cambodia with his bride & getting to know our pastor on a personal level; watching the depth of community & family grow in our church.
Stephanie - Physical & spiritual stretching through injuries, trips & situations that brought both tears and laughter. Completing the online college course was pretty cool too.

January
After ten years of driving the Tahoe, we upgraded to a 2007 Suburban. I'm pretty fond of the heated seats.
Completed our training for our foster license. 
Game night with the ladies at NCCTK.
Shaved my grandma's hair off due to chemotherapy.


February
Myriam had her EEG to rule out any seizure disorders.
Tim and I celebrated one year from our renewal and baptism celebrations.
Ran my first trail race.

March
Tim traveled to Cambodia with Brian Davidson.
We took a family trip to Disneyland with Grandpa John & Grandma Judy.
Shaved my other grandma's hair off due to chemotherapy.

April
Easter celebrations.
Spring Break entertainment of friend play dates, Tulip fields & organization.
Became a certified foster family.


May
My dad blew himself up on the boat.
Tim and I took an anniversary trip to senior town up north.
We had our first and only s'mores of the season.
Daddy dates running errands with Grandpa Doug in the plane & having treats with Addi.


June
I ran the Deception Pass Half Marathon.
Kids had the end of the year art show at the library.
Hiked Galbraith Mountain with Uncle Jason, Auntie Traci & the cousins.

July
Make Jesus Famous YWAM launch.
Tim sang with Realtime for the ten year reunion of winning gold.
Multiple Birch Bay sand dates. 

August
Tristan came to stay with us for a few days of respite care.
Pool party at Auntie Traci's.
Cooling off in the creek with neighbor friends. 
Family trip to Hefley Lake.



September
I ran a 10k & walked 5 miles with my mom in the North County Road Run.
All Day Campus Classes begun for Addison and Charlie. 
I started my first online college course at CCEF.
The highlight of the year was the trip to Cambodia with My Love. 

October
Ran the Milkshake Run up and over Stewart Mountain.
A family trip to Great Wolf Lodge with Papa and Nana.
We took our last trip to Stoney Ridge Farms gathering pumpkins and fall treats.
Tore my calf muscle resulting in an eight week recovery process.

November
Jacob Dean, Myriam's biological brother, was born. 
Myriam started Preschool.
I took the girls to Frozen on Ice. 
Tim and I enjoyed an overnight at Snug Harbor Marina Resort with some Element Friends.
We celebrated Papa retiring after 40 years on the job.


December
Finally was given clearance to slowly start running again.
Addison had a girls sleepover with friends from school while Charlie had a sleepover with Auntie Traci.
Impromptu New Year's Eve party with the Ellis and VanderPol families. 


Well, that's a wrap. Goodbye 2015. 
Nice to meet you 2016.